S.I.S. Sisters in success

By Cyrena Martin

You never make that initial contact or introduce yourself. Why is there such hesitation to jump at the opportunity to congratulate our sisters for their style, charisma, and accomplishments?  And even more importantly, why don’t successful, powerful women in leadership take the time to coach, mentor and uplift those who are struggling to start a business, get promoted, or secure a seat in the executive board room?

“When women support women, amazing things can happen” -Viola Davis

​Hey Sis, Sister, Sistah! 

We are Daughters, Mothers, Aunties, Grandmothers, WOG (Women of God), Entrepreneurs, Girlfriends, and yes— we are Sisters. Have you experienced those awkward moments when you are in awe of other women yet not quite sure what to do or say?  You are loving her outfit, her business savvy and confidence but instead of a compliment or asking where she purchased her shoes, you remain silent.  You never make that initial contact or introduce yourself. Why is there such hesitation to jump at the opportunity to congratulate our sisters for their style, charisma, and accomplishments?  And even more importantly, why don’t successful, powerful women in leadership take the time to coach, mentor and uplift those who are struggling to start a business, get promoted, or secure a seat in the executive board room?  One of my favorite sayings is: “We are much more alike than different:”

Our Journeys Are a Collaboration, NOT a Competition! 
Collaboration is similar to cooperation. It is the process of two or more people, entities or organizations working together to complete a task or achieve a goal. Collaboration is a working practice whereby individuals work together for a common purpose to achieve business benefit. 

“While we may be individually strong, we are collectively powerful.”  ~Rakhi Voria, Worldwide Inside Sales Business Manager with Microsoft

Far too often we miss opportunities to elevate by supporting and uplifting others while on our respective paths. Yes we work hard and often discover new doors for advancement on our journeys, however we cannot forget that the goal is collaboration, not competition.  Let’s normalize some best practices for healthy collaboration: 

1.  Create opportunities to connect away from work. Get to know each other; find out about another woman's passion, family, goals and dreams. The mere six degrees of separation is likely at play, and you will surely find something in common.  
2. Be Trustworthy! Never repeat or share information learned without permission— no matter what!  Confidentiality will build trust and keep your reputation intact.  Repeating or sharing can easily turn into or be perceived as gossip.  Be the safe space for your sisters. Let them know you will be completely honest and that she will receive the support she needs to be successful. By the same token, if you are the one receiving support, be mindful of boundaries, be respectful of time, and value any corrective action or critique.    
3. Join groups, organizations, or clubs that are in alignment with your aspirations.  Be an active member and attend both educational and entertainment events.  Listen, learn, ask and contribute to conversations. Prioritize exchanging ideas and creating teams who work together to reach goals and fulfill missions so that no one person feels overwhelmed or overworked.  Celebrate each other together and out loud—(“We did it!”) Those we join forces with become our best supporters because they come to know our work ethic, dedication, and desire to be successful.  
4. Encourage, empower, and lift each other up often.  It is always ok to compliment, support, and cheer on your Sister.  Today is her day and it’s ok to let her shine. Acknowledging the achievements of others shows security and strength; knowing that tomorrow, someone will take time to see you at your best, too. Set competition aside— what is meant for you is meant only for you and cannot be copied or taken from you. We are born with skills and talents which need to be nourished.  Our uniqueness is what makes us successful at whatever we choose to do.  Believe in yourself!  
5. Tell your story.  Transparency saves lives.  Although you make it look easy and glamorous, be forthcoming about the challenges that present before the triumphs. There is a sense of empowerment when we do not feel alone in the struggle for success.  We are role models! However, if we do not share the entire story (including obstacles), onlookers may give up after facing the same missteps we once encountered.  Share the journey, not solely the success.   ​